Doing your own divorce

DIY and DIO divorces
Which translate as Do It Yourself Divorce and Do It Online Divorce respectively. 

Divorce mediation - always a good place to start 
It is always better if a couple in the throes of getting divorced can reach agreement about without a long drawn out battle and if you want to avoid going to court then mediation can offer a good solution. You will have to pay for using such a service but it will probably be cheaper than using a divorce solicitor to decide who gets the toaster, the foot spa or custody of Tiddles.

To find a divorce mediation service and for further information you can download a Community Legal Advice leaflet on this subject or visit the website for National Family Mediation .

Do your own divorce

Divorce online
The online divorce comes in three versions.  The basic one is really just a straightforward Do It Yourself Divorce but most online services offer free telephone and e-mail backup. They cost in the region of £55 but this excludes court fees and costs involved in issuing a Consent Order (order made by the Court of terms agreed by both parties).

Mediation - a better way to divorce: Part One

Divorce proceedings can be vicious, protracted and very expensive.  Fighting to the last breath is destructive and usually denies the divorcing couple any chance of being able to enjoy or even contemplate attending future family occasions.

It never ceases to amaze how two people who once loved each other enough to join their lives together can rip each other apart in the name of fairness and justice.  There is another way, (apologies for stealing the old strap line of NatWest, widely believed to be one the most incompetent banks in the world) it's called mediation.

Mediation
Family mediation is the most widely practiced form of mediation.  Usually, the family mediator sees both parties together at a number of sessions.  Clearly, the couple must be on speaking terms and agree to cooperate in the process.

Family mediators come from a variety of backgrounds and so bring a wide knowledge, experience and common sense to the process of reaching an agreement.  If a problem needs legal advice they can always refer to a solicitor for clarification and guidance.

What do mediators do
The mediator works out an agreement for the division of the family's assets and child maintenance.  When an agreement is reached, the mediator prepares a summary for each spouse.  This will then be handed to solicitors to be translated into a Court document.

Mediation is a way of avoiding the British adversarial legal system which is often best suited to murder trials and commercial litigation rather than the emotional mayhem of a disintegrating marriage.  The government has encouraged this form of conflict resolution for many years through the Family Law Act 1996.  We can put you in touch with a local Family mediator or you can find a local mediator through the following organisations:

National Family Mediation  0207 485 8809 and www.nfm.org.uk
The UK College of Family Mediators  0207 391 9162 and http://www.ukcfm.co.uk/
Family Mediation Helpline  0845 6026627

What happens if it does not work
If this mediation fails then you will have to use the traditional route using lawyers and possibly be back to the mud and blood of trench warfare.  So it's really worth trying hard to reach a mediated agreement because if you don't the court will enforce one on both of you.

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