Parenting is still very much part of your life after divorce
Bringing up your children whether as a resident or non resident parent should still be an important part of your life after divorce. Parenting after divorce is often complex, frustrating and confusing.
The divorce is tangible evidence of the fact that you no longer wish to share your lives together. However, in life after divorce you still need to share the care and upbringing of your kids. They need both parents to play an active role in their lives. This is not an easy thing to do.
In many divorces the relationship between ex spouses is basically appalling. Stress, unhappiness and anger take their toll. The more confrontational the divorce and the longer the divorce process the more difficult it is to be able to have successful co-parenting arrangements. This alone argues for a Family Mediator approach to divorce rather than the more traditional trench warfare approach using a solicitor .
So here are some thoughts to help cope with the challenge of raising happy, well-adjusted children through cooperative co-parenting.
Attitudes take time to become established. Just because it did not go too well straight after the divorce it does not mean that you can't both persevere to give your children a better life through positive co-parenting. It's never too late to start regardless of how long you have been divorced. The decisions you make today in terms of being positive and cooperative will have an effect upon your kids for the rest of their lives.
If you perceive yourself to be a victim in your divorce, you will find and focus on the evidence to prove that to be true. However, if you focus upon learning from the experience you can derive benefits and value in your life after divorce, despite how much pain was involved in the divorce process. You will also more readily accept responsibility for your part in the collapse of your relationship. There is no such thing as total blame for one side or the other.
Be respectful to each other