Gardening for divorcees

Don't just vegetate, get in the garden and get some fresh air and exercise. As well as being a way to unwind in your post divorce life, gardening can be an immensely fulfilling pastime.

To boldly grow…  
You may have dreams of stepping through a doorway framed with glorious old fashioned scented roses and honeysuckle into an idyllic garden full of lavender, hollyhocks and apple trees laden with fruit, or of sitting down to a meal of freshly picked home grown vegetables. But then the reverie gives way to the reality of bindweed, bugs and blight.

So what is the attraction of gardening that makes it irresistible to some and anathema to others. How many rocky relationships have been tipped over the edge by arguments about whose turn it was to mow the motley collection of moss and weeds laughingly referred to as a lawn? “He refused to cut the grass m’lud” has probably been cited as one of the reasons for a divorce on more than one occasion.

The joy of gardening
Seeing a piece of hitherto neglected ground flourish can make all the preparation, patience and attention worthwhile. Indeed, gardening can be wonderful therapy for a troubled soul after the trauma of divorce bringing a sense of well being and calm alongside the satisfaction of creating something both beautiful and useful.

But this sense of fulfilment is only part of the pleasure. The physical experience of gardening is also intensely rewarding as well as providing essential exercise. Whatever trials and tribulations you may have experienced with your divorce, there’s no better way to get life back into perspective than grabbing a garden fork or a spade and getting stuck into those weeds.

Little and often
Gardening, like housework, is best done little and often. There is no point in knocking yourself out once or twice a year having a massive onslaught on accumulated weeds and overgrown shrubs and hedging. It is much better to tackle it in manageable chunks over a period of time.

If your garden has been very neglected then you may find it worthwhile getting some professional help restoring order or if you have offspring try bribing them to give you a hand. Thereafter, as long as you spend a little time keeping grass and hedges cut and the worst of the weeds at bay you may find that time spent in your garden gradually becomes more of a pleasure and less of a chore.

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Grow your own

Grow your own vegetables
Growing at least some of your own food is perfectly feasible in your new life after divorce and will help take your mind off your woes. The smallest garden is capable of sustaining a plot or even some containers devoted to fruit and vegetables and most are not difficult to cultivate given a little loving care.

Tomatoes of course are particularly suited to growing in pots in or out of a greenhouse. Most vegetables are annuals grown fromseed and packets come with growing information on the the back, so it is advisable that you research the best varieties for your garden before you clear the racks at your local garden centre.

Broad, runner and French beans, brassicas (cabbage family) courgettesand tomatoes can be bought as immature plants in trays and pots which you may find more convenient if you do not have a cold frame or a greenhouse for bringing on seedlings.

Feeling fruity?
Fruit growing does not have to involve an orchard of apple or plum trees or acres of polytunnels protecting early (and late) crops of strawberries. A modest suburban garden can support at least one or two small modern fruit trees and if you are more adventurous and have the patience, cordons and espaliers of fruit will make good use of a fence or a wall.

A fig tree will flourish in a sunny sheltered garden and less usual fruiting trees such as quince look stunning with their crops of golden fruit in the autumn and are not difficult to grow. A few raspberry canes and some strawberry plants can easily be incorporated into a flower border along with a handsome stand of rhubarb or a couple of gooseberry or blackcurrant bushes.

Get some help from some fine books
If you are a complete novice but would like to try your hand at a little self sufficiency in the garden we have selected a number of books which will help you produce some great food and have a great time doing it.

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Not a lot of plot

Place a layer of clean stones or pieces of broken pots in the base of each container to prevent the compost being washed out of the drainage holes. Loam based composts are a good choice for tubs and pots whereas the lighter soiless composts based on coir or peat are more suitable for hanging baskets but if allowed to dry out can be very difficult to remoisten.

Hanging baskets should be lined with a waterproof membrane, a tough black bin bag – remember to make holes for drainage in it - is a cheap option, to stop them drying out too quickly. Also remember to locate baskets so you are able to reach to water them. Plants grown in containers will quickly use up nutrient so need to be fed at least once a week at the height of the growing season.

Be bold
The only limit on what you can grow in containers is your imagination. Don’t think of using that lovely old terracotta pot just for plonking a few geraniums in during the summer. With a little thought you can have a fabulous selection of plants to give colour and interest all year round and charming containers can be bought in all shapes and sizes or utilised from old sinks or lidless pots from the kitchen. Don’t forget that lots of varieties of fruit, vegetables and herbs will grow very happily in containers and Greenfingers sell a good range of pots, planters and hanging baskets ready for you to fill.

If you have a small garden then planting climbers will give you lots of interest without taking up precious space. Wigwams of canes can be easily and cheaply constructed to support sweet peas for example or climbing plants such as clematis and jasmine can be trained to grow over and through other shrubs or small trees. Two for the price of one as they say – can’t be bad.

Low maintenance options
Finally, if you enjoy a garden, but not the gardening, the following suggestions should help.

Choose plants that are hardy and easy-to-care for and don’t require watering in times of drought.

If you hate mowing a lawn then shale is a good alternative.  A rock garden is a wonderful easy-to-maintain landscape, and there are ple...